Readers of La Blag have complained about work filters banning new posts because of ‘pornographic’ content. Then some Chief Choo Choo Bod at Virgin Trains gets back to me regarding the totally unenvironmentally sound sliced apples in bags full of gases they serve on their trains and provides me with the above headline. What to do?

Yes, Comrade Blag has received a reponse from the Chief Executive. Being a lady, albeit a neo-enviro-anarcho-activist lady, my original letter was of course very polite, praising Virgin for all their good work with luxury Caribbean eco-islands, etc, but pointing out that not only is there no excuse for stocking sliced apples flown half way round the world and back in PLASTIC bags – hygiene schmygiene why Gene? – but also raising the point that this sort of activity is not only REALLY BAD for the ozone layer but could, shock horror, also damage their green credentials! [Yeah, what green credentials?..airlines, schmairlines, etc,] After all can Al Gore really afford to been seen to be hanging out with Sir Dickie when this sort of inconsistency – nay – hypocrisy – goes on within his own corporate portcullis? (Of course he can and he will, but whether he should and would…)

This is the response I received:

Dear [Blag Lady]

Thank you for your letter dated 16 November to which Richard has asked me to reply.

I note your comments concerning the availability of apples on our trains and we are conscious that some of our customers would prefer to purchase apples that are in their natural form.

Currently, we sell the fruit in bags in order to comply with our hygiene standards but we do hope that at some time soon we shall be in a position to provide “fresh” fruit with a suitable “wipe” to ensure that the apple you purchase is clean.

I should add however that sliced apples are very popular with customers, nevertheless, I see your point and your thoughts will be taken on board.

Thanks for writing.

Yours…etc

Lady Bonde who will soon be heading up the charge good and proper as a climate change campaigner with Greenpeace Amsterdam !! well done!! says this sort of namby pamby corporate fluff is offically termed ‘greenwash’. Being currently engaged with my magnum opus I’ve not had time to respond. When I do, as Zed Bed pointed out, I shall be demanding my 25 million squids from Sir D himself!

Posts are even more irregular than usual as I am finishing my book! Bear with me.

Comrade Blag